despite doing 3000 miles in 3.5 days last october (much thru the wilds of canada) i'm more than ready for another roadtrip.........now we all know the perfect roadtrips start spontaneously with little more than a vehicle, credit card and possibly being under the influence (no i don't advocate driving drunk/stoned or stupid - that's when you let yer friends drive so you can even get more wasted......). but admittedly a roadtrip to a hostile foreign country does require a bit of planning...........(passports, matching stories and attitude). oh, do you think canada is a peaceful nation? try spending an hour or so at canadian customs - but that's another story - avoid the sumas/abbotsford crossing......
however, there has been discussion as of late of the vital need for a large and personal stash of two (and possibly the only two) of canada's positive attributes - bueno candy bars and beaver buzz energy drinks. can't get either one in the states. they are forbidden fruit, made ever so much sweeter by the exotic (and dangerous) location. over the border. yes, THAT border......into the land of poutine, red green, damnable customs officials and "eh"..... although i really do want to see their faces when - in that little room with that lone naked light bulb hanging down over me - i tell them in all honesty i'm headin' into canada for the beaver buzz and bueno bars.......
we can make it from northern california to the border in less than 12 hours. that includes stops for gas and whatever. don't think we can??? if we didn't get (a) lost in portland (b) distracted by a great cosmetics sale in mt. vernon washington and (c) stuck in road construction hell just south of the sumas crossing we would've made it easy in 12 hours last time. that dark red streak blazing up I-5 that dark october night was US! only time i slowed down to something close to the legal speed limit was in southern oregon because - as a former resident of medford, oregon - i know how much oregon state police LOVE to pull over vehicles with california plates. no, i don't respect authority that much but i dislike a ticket and a hassle even more.....
anyway that's the plan. 48 hours in canada (as to be able to bring back $800 worth of candy and beaver buzz back duty free). then haul ass back across the border. of course it'll be on this blog........... and this time we'll be ready for canada. there will be mandatory stops at http://voodoodoughnut.com/ and http://www.bigfootjava.com/ in mt. vernon WA. canada? hopefully we can just blend in somewhere around vancouver as we fill up the back of the yukon with forbidden fruit...........natch we will find the places that canadian tourism does NOT want you to know about......
hopefully in a few months i'll have completed this mission (obviously after moving back down to california where all my craziest friends are) and can share the whole sordid tale (names will be changed to protect the innocent and the guilty)..........later
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